Remembering Jesse

[backspin]

It popped up in my facebook feed that Jesse (Spazactaz) died 4 years ago yesterday. I worked on a painted portrait of him for his mom, so I see it come up every year. Several members here pulled together to make Christmas gifts for his family, and also donated money to help me pay for the framing / shipping of the painting. That was a very special time for me. I still have the messages Jesse & I sent back & forth about his painting. It isn't the best painting I'll ever do, but it will always be one of the most dear to me.

RIP Jesse. Here he is skating an exhibition.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glo4PzYQCTE

 

[BittyBug]

Jesse was a force of positivity, and what I recall most about him is how often he ended his posts with a laugh, often at himself. He seemed like such a kind, genuine kid, who was so generous with his time, helping others advance their skills, providing advice and anecdotes about skating, and ultimately sharing details about his illness, even in its most excruciatingly painful moments.

If you are still in touch with his parents, please let them know that I remember him fondly.

 

[AxelAnnie]

Goodness. It can't have been that long ago. It was a privilege to be part of the project

 

[vesperholly]

Remembering Spaz fondly ... Here's an article on his memorial service, which shares more about his life: http://www.fortmacleodgazette.com/2013/fort-macleod-bids-farewell-to-popular-skater-jesse-smith/

His skating was really lovely. Beauty of a 2axel and 3salchow in that link above.

 

[Garden Kitty]

I remember him for his positive spirit and the grace with which he faced his fears and challenges. He made a lasting impression on a lot of us here.

 

[jlai]

I remember Kurt Browning called him at the hospital, if memory serves.

that was a nice 2a.

 

[myhoneyhoney]

I remember Jesse. I can’t believe it’s 4 years already.

 

[cholla]

I remember him well too. He was going through such an ordeal, his last posts were heart wrenching. Poor soul.

 

[Japanfan]

I'm saddened to be reminded of this, may Jesse RIP.

 

[skatefan]

I often think of Spazactaz, he was such a vibrant presence on FSU.

His final postings were the saddest I've read. At Christmas time I think of his parents and the crystal star which I think @Spun Silver organised.

Not forgotten Spazactaz, nor those other FSUers we have sadly lost over a few short years.

 

[skatesindreams]

He was so courageous.
RIP, dear Spazactaz/Jesse.

 

[Spun Silver]

Thanks for tagging me, @skatefan. I did some stuff, or tried, but the crystal star was another person’s gift to Jesse.

I emailed his mother at the time of Skate Canada in 2015 to let her know I was thinking of Jesse, and her. She wrote back: “So nice to hear from you thank you for getting in touch. Yes we are doing fairly well not a day goes by that we dont think and talk about Jesse we are always bringing him up with each other or to someone else. He is so missed everyday, we have that painting and his skates as well as pictures etc.. of him in our living room and look n remember him everyday..Porki [his little dog] is doing real well and we believe she was meant to come into our lives when she did as she is a great distraction ..we r attending Skate Canada this weekend that will be hard as i havnt really watched alot of skating since but a wonderful lady bought us tickets so I am so looking forward to it im sure i will watch with a few tears....”

I have many emails from him that it is still too painful to reread. I like to remember how passionate he was about skating technique and how he knew the IJS inside and out. He was also an artist and musician. It seemed to me he could have made a career as a coach or choreographer. We were emailing in the last agonized days, or hours, of his life - he couldnt breathe. I am still angry with the system that made him wait so long to see a specialist that he had to “borrow” (?) an appointment that a friend of his had... and then he was misdiagnosed, and that mistake cost him his young life. Such a beautiful, gifted, sweet young man.

On a somewhat lighter note, I remember that when he was hoping to attend Skate Canada, he kept mentioning that he wasnt eating. I couldnt understand what the problem was. Finally I wrote, Jesse, are you starving yourself so you’ll look good at Skate Canada?!? He admitted it. One of his medications had made him bloated. LOL! Youth! Anyway, he ended up being too sick to make the trip.

Rest in peace, Jesse. Show the angels how to skate.

 

[alexikeguchi]

Thanks so much for the link to Jesse's performance... It made me smile and tear up at the same time to see the joy he exuded in his skating. I too can't believe it has been four years, as his posts throughout his illness and the courage he displayed made such a lasting impression. I know he had minimal mobility as the end was approaching, and I pray and trust that he's finally free again to soar without any more limitation. Love and blessings to his survivors.

 

[AxelAnnie]

It popped up in my facebook feed that Jesse (Spazactaz) died 4 years ago yesterday. I worked on a painted portrait of him for his mom, so I see it come up every year. Several members here pulled together to make Christmas gifts for his family, and also donated money to help me pay for the framing / shipping of the painting. That was a very special time for me. I still have the messages Jesse & I sent back & forth about his painting. It isn't the best painting I'll ever do, but it will always be one of the most dear to me.

RIP Jesse. Here he is skating an exhibition.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glo4PzYQCTE

I don't think I ever saw him skate. Glorious. Reminds me a bit over Matt Savoie

 

[backspin]

@Spun Silver THANK YOU so much for posting that letter from his mom!!

You were the one who organized everyone (including me), and were so helpful. I so very much appreciated your work, and still remember that with something like wonder, how people from all over the country, who didn't know each other except through an online message board, got together to help another person who we had never met.

 

[Spun Silver]

Thank you so much, @backspin. A lot of people outdid themselves to help Jesse. It WAS amazing. He and his plight called forth the very best of FSU.

 

[skatesindreams]

SpunSilver, I'm glad that we "met" through supporting Jesse.

 

[Spun Silver]

SpunSilver, I'm glad that we "met" through supporting Jesse.

Aw, now I’m getting embarrassed. Thank you, @skatesindreams. Me too.

 

[Vash01]

Aw, now I’m getting embarrassed. Thank you, @skatesindreams. Me too.

Me too.

 

[LilJen]

I still get a little sad when I see Lindt truffles, which were his favorite. Can't believe it's been four years. Gone way, way, way too soon, and yes, his last posts were truly heart-wrenching.

 

[Vash01]

I still get a little sad when I see Lindt truffles, which were his favorite. Can't believe it's been four years. Gone way, way, way too soon, and yes, his last posts were truly heart-wrenching.

I remember him every time I see the various Lindor Truffles at the grocery store.